Preparing for Eternity- Learning to let go

Our first date, Ben made us dinner, my favorite, Taco Salad. If you ask him, it was a cheap date idea to cook dinner and dessert and watch a movie. But, for me it was the most thoughtful date. Not every girl needs big bucks to win her over. He had flowers for me, my favorite dinner, a super clean apartment and I was blown away at how clean and how well kept everything was!

During the movie we sat close, but he didn't try any moves or anything! That made me a very happy girl! I was done dating remember? Not too long before this. Haha We had great conversation, we played Phase 10 while our food was cooking, it was all so perfect! 

Ben loves to surprise me! He loves any kind of reaction! He surprised me with more flowers when I had a bad day!

He surprised me with a pizza and water bottle brought by his assistant all the way from Heber on a day I forgot lunch! He surprised me with a full day of fun on my Birthday! 

We went to Tracy Aviary to see Barney, the owl, we spent most of the day at Lagoon with my sisters and a family dinner afterward! I have had to learn to let him buy me things and spoil me. Some may think sarcastically, what a rough adjustment! But, really, I like to take care of myself. I hate being dependent on others. So, letting him buy a shirt, or flowers, or spending wayyy too much on dinner or holidays, is SO hard! But, I am learning this is how he shows his love, this is what makes him happy! In fact one of our first fights was because I wouldn't try on a shirt that he wanted to buy me. I was stubborn about letting him spend so much on me and he was so offended that I wouldn't let him. We live and we learn, right? And he continues to surprise me... Especially when he popped the question!!

Preparing for Eternity- learning to accept the Love you deserve

One day (only a couple days after our original messaging) at work Ben and I had been texting all day. Ben is the GM at Papa John's (in Heber at the time). So, he has a lot of responsibility, and a lot of late nights like I do. So, texting throughout the day is how we got learn about each other.

 Well, this day I had just finished with my last client, I gathered my things and I went out side. I usually park my jeep facing the salon so I can keep an eye on it but for some reason I had it facing the back of the parking lot. I set my things on the front seat and when I looked forward there were flowers on the hood. My initial thought was, 'someone left their flowers.'  Then I noticed they were purposefully tucked in the light guard I had on my light. Which confused me even more. 'Maybe Courtney stopped by to surprise me, she does stuff like that? Or Nicole? But usually only of they hear I had a bad day..?..' I was seriously confused. I was driving with the flowers sitting next to me and I couldn't help but get a little teary-eyed because someone, somewhere, was thinking about me...

 I put them in a vase, took pictures, bragged on Facebook hoping to show appreciation to whomever had surprised me. I was texting Ben again, picking up where we left of. A little while later he asked if anything had happened that day. In my head I thought there is no way this stranger left flowers for me, so I didn't say anything. A little bit later he asked, "Am I in trouble?" Haha I was confused and said, "No, why would you be?" It look him a while and his next text said, "flowers". 

I was overcome with emotion! I didn't just let a few tears fall, I was sobbing! I had never in my 25 years recieved flowers Just Because or been pursued by a guy like this. Ben will never know, no matter how many times I tell him, how much those flowers and that gesture meant to me! And still means to me! I knew this man knows how to treat a woman and make her feel special no matter how far he lives, no matter how busy he is at work, no matter that we haven't even met in person! These flowers said so much! They said, "You mean something to me", "I want to know you more", "I will treat you with respect and continually show you bhow much I care". At the time, they were meant to show that Ben was interested in meeting me in person and that he was the type of man to go out of his way to show it. He told me these were the first of many flowers.

Preparing for Eternity- learning the Lord's timing

I had my heart broken, I was working full time at the salon and I had been going to school at Utah College of Massage Therapy for about 3 months after work and I still had about 9 months left. I think it was safe to say, I had given up on dating! I figured I DO NOT have time to date nor am I ready to have my heart open to anyone any time soon! I decided to delete my online dating profile, to physically take myself off the market. 

It was a Sunday Morning, I was on my phone trying and struggling to figure out how to delete my profile, not just hide it. I received a message from someone named Rosigon with no photo. Out of curiosity I read the message. It wasn't your typical, hey, wat up? It was a paragraph! Expressing interest! I thought for a minute.... and then continued on my quest to delete my profile. 

During sacrament meeting I couldn't get Rosigon and my message out of my head. So, I decided 'what the heck, he seemed nice and genuinely interested.' So I replied. He almost immediately replied back! So that whole day we messaged back and forth. I wish I had a copy of what we talked about. Mostly I remember church and having a relationship with God. I learned he had been inactive for a long time and January he started going back to church and working on getting to the temple! He had just started to read The Book of Mormon for his first time! The little missionary in me was EXCITED!!

Later that day he asked for my phone number and I learned his name was Ben. Funny thing. After he got my number and I went back to my profile to delete it, it was plain as day! Also, he didn't have a picture because he had just started his profile.  Talk about timing!